COLUMBIAD
STARDATE 04.11.21
PRE-HISTORY YEARS
Having just transported aboard the Columbiad, Walker Wallabig and Mea’ai Funefe’ai walked along the metal corridors heading to their quarters. They each carried luggage and suitcases containing their personal effects.
Walker was a young, handsome man from Australia with blonde hair and a muscular body. A yellow mustache sat above his mouth like a caterpillar. Mea’ai was a large Samoan with an oversized belly. He towered over Walker, not just in height, but also in width.
“We’re finally here, Mate!” Walker exclaimed with joy. He walked with confidence beside Mea’ai. Walker was smiling widely. “I can’t wait tah get tah know the women oin this ship!”
“I too am glad to be here,” Mea’ai replied in a soft tone. The large man was thinking of his ingredients and what he was going to prepare for tonight. “It’s going to be a real challenge feeding this entire ship.”
“How can yah think aboit food with all thah pretty ladies aboard?” Walker joked as he patted Mea’ai on the back.
“It’s my Duty as Chef of the Columbiad,” Mea’ai said with a smile. “Your Nutrition is, literally, my Responsibility.”
“Ah can’t thoink o food with mah loins burstin for activity, if yah know what ah mean!” Walker stated as if he was a slave to his passions. “Did yah see the Art Officer in thah Briefings? Be still mah Heart! An what bout thah Counselor? Ah bit cold, but exoitically beautiful. Thah Zoology Officer was stunnin too. An that’s not oiven mentionin thah four Crewmen ah saw who caught mah oiye!”
Mea’ai seemed unconcerned with his friend’s preoccupation with women. “I suggest you curb your romantic tendencies for awhile. At least until we get into deep space. We have a job to do. Mine is to Cook. And yours is to Navigate.”
“Ah know, ah know,” Walker blurted out clearly annoyed. However, his eyes lit up when a pretty crewman passed by him in the hallway. He tilted his head, smiled, and said, “G’Day.” The crewman smiled back, but said nothing.
Walker and Mea’ai came to a stop at a junction. Mea’ai looked left while Walker stared straight ahead.
“This is where we part,” Mea’ai said in a relaxed tone. “The Galley is this way. I’m eager to see it. You go on to your room. I’ll see you in the Galley for Dinner tonight.”
“Alrighty, Mate,” Walker agreed. “Hey, what do yah think oi thah Robot they brought oin board? It’s supposed tah help us with our mission. Thah thing can outdo anythin ah Human can do, but it’s ah bit slow wid human behavior. Supposed tah be learnin as it goes, though.”
Mea’ai shook his head. “I prefer organic things, like fruits and vegetables. And Robots don’t eat. But it’s not my decision to make. If Terra Command believes the Robot is necessary, then it must be.”
“You’re right, Mate,” Walker confirmed. “Who cares bout some Robot when there ah all thoise beautiful women oin board??”
Walker let out a laugh and began to walk straight ahead. Mea’ai prepared to head left toward the Galley. But then Walker called out one last time.
“Oh, an Mate?” Walker yelled as he winked with one eye.
“DOIN’T DO ANYTHIN AH WOULDN’T DO!”
